First Refuge discussion

12/5/2011

First Refuge discussion

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David Weinstein recently recorded this talk kicking off our discussion of the 16 precepts at the heart of Buddhism.

We will continue this series for several months. The precepts interact differently with each person and the point of the talks is to stimulate discussion. Please use the comments to let us know what comes up for you.

6 Comments

Mr. Propter link

12/5/2011 03:35:40 pm

Taking refuge as a recognition of something that has already happened rings true for me. I've been meditating pretty much daily for years, and now I'm part of at least one sangha...I feel that it's about time in my life for me, if not to preach what I practice, at least to be able to describe it accurately to others. I'm a religious person, a meditation practitioner, a Zen Buddhist: it feels like I'm coming out of the closet.

David Weinstein

12/6/2011 03:29:27 am

I think the process of exploring the precepts helps us to better understand what the practice means to us, a process of discovry, which results in our being able to better desribe it to ourselves and then, quite naturally to others. It's an ogoing process that lasts a lifetime, isn't that great?

Jenny link

12/6/2011 08:52:59 am

Taking refuge for me feels like a home coming.

My childhood home never felt like a real home to me. My mother was a flamboyant narcissist wanabe artist, who didn't know how to draw out and include the feelings and needs of her children. We grew up like many of my generation--learning to gage and take care of the needs of the parent. In my twenties creating what I thought to be a "real home" became my goal. I married young, someone that I later noticed was very much like my mother, denying my feelings all over again. The result was depression, therapy, divorce, and much more therapy.

Therapy saved my life, and it became a home to me like I'd never known one. My therapist was my advocate and the lioness mother that I so needed. About eight years into that I of course outgrew this home too. Next I found a home in self help and spirituality, and studied with wonderful teachers such as Tolle, Katie, and Adyashanti. For the most part these relationships were one way--they talked to me and to several hundred or thousand other people. I outgrew this home too, looking for ways to have a two way relationship with teachers and sangha.

I sensed the next step for me was to learn from my own mistakes, by saying yes to all the colors brought on by relating to teachers and sangha. I came to PZI two years ago and sat almost every sesshin since.

What caught me by surprise was noticing how through meditation a sense of home began welling up inside, one that was not tied to anyone or anything. The half empty glass became half full, my needs to receive from others started to diminish, and the ability to give is growing.

Knowing myself and finding a home in myself is also taking refuge in Buddha's home. From here taking Buddha's vows seems good common sense on the one hand, but also a good way to honor and celebrate my homecoming. Like David talked about getting married and noticing the growing of closeness and intimacy through it, I am curious what surprises await me through the process that we have begun here, and after tying the knot.

thanks for reading,

in a super-sized nutshell,
Jenny

David Weinstein

12/6/2011 07:57:09 pm

Thanks Jenny, I'm reminded of the saying, 'When you notice you've gone, you're already home.' The precepts help us notice we've gone.

Marika

12/20/2011 02:44:11 am

Jenny, thank you so much for that. I share the same sense of homelessness that stems from my childhood, and I still struggle with feeling like I'm home. It gives me hope that a feeling of home has started to come to you in meditation. I feel a real sense of family with the sangha, but on a deeper level the feeling of rootlessness remains.

David Weinstein

12/20/2011 04:37:14 am

I think we find that sense of home in the midst of the 'rootlessness' that Marika mentioned. I remember when I was travelling in India, mostly by train, there was a time that I spread out my blanket on the plank that was my second class sleeper's bed and got this palpable sense of 'Ah,home.' As we become more at home in the midst of our thoughts, as we pay attention to them in our meditation, becoming familiar with them, intimate with them, we find our home.

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